The knot in my stomach tightens at the thought of reading the words spilling across the page... my mouth becomes dry as my palms begin to drip. The pressure in my temples builds as I realize my fingers are dancing across the keys. Its oddly freeing, realizing the words forming in my head are being carried out in a solid form... as solid as the internet can be. A world all my own. Free of the judgment and repercussions of the real world. At the same time, this world I have the ability to create feels very alone... when I talk outlaid I talk to feel the reaction, the feedback, the connection from another human being. This feels cold. Slow, Unfamiliar. The chance of pace will be good though. This is my world, this is what I want to see. This is what I want to read. This is the voice in my head spilling out across the page. So where do I begin...? Anywhere I want to!
When I was younger, I had a blue bedroom, it was like living inside a robin's egg. If I lay the right way in my bed I could see the moonlight dancing through the branches of the tree in my neighbors yard. I had soft blankets to nest in, I had a doll named Noni to keep me safe when I was alone. I have a sister, and a mother. I have father figures, and reasons to hate men. I have feelings, and dreams and goals and fears and reasons to express myself. I have reasons to write (read:blog) again.
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